The world of management has transitioned from the harsh dictatorial environments of the past to a less offensive approach of today. However, for the most part, we have not equipped our managers with the ability to handle confrontation in a better way; carefronting. Carefronting is confrontation with compassion.
We need to cast the vision and offer the path for our upcoming leaders to understand their purpose as a leader of people when it comes to confrontation. Once it is understood, we need to give our leaders the knowledge and skills they need to accomplish the vision and ensure they have the desire to be the style of leader we need.
Definition of a good leader:
From Good to Great Leadership Levels
Level 3 Leader is a “Competent manager that organizes people and resources effectively”
We cannot manage effectively if we can’t have the “difficult conversations” when they are needed. We need to help our leaders gain the skills and be comfortable carefronting; confronting with the purpose of educating.
Action Steps needed to guide leaders:
Help our leaders see managing in confrontation as education not discipline.
7 Habits of Highly Effective People says:
1. Help leaders have a Paradigm Shift
2. Teach them to be Proactive, to be part of the solution by educating the employee; not Reactive by harsh tactics or Inactive by complaining, but do nothing to help the employee improve
3. Help the leader think “the cup is half full, not half empty”; they have an opportunity to teach, not a problem to correct; teach people “to fish”, don’t “give them a fish”
4. Teach the leader to see the employee through the Iceberg Concept of knowing what is below “see” level; knowing how each individual is motivated and the learning style of each personality in their charge
5. Teach them to become an Empathetic Listener; Focused on words, body language, emotion; know why they think the way they do
6. Help them form the Habit of good management that leads people successfully. According to 7 Habits of Highly Effective People, forming a habit takes:
Knowledge (what to do and why to do it)
Skills (how to do it and have the tools needed to do it)
Desire (want to do it and are motivated to do it)
How do we know someone is a carefronter? Let their employees rate them, or at least ask the leader to rate themselves as they believe their employees see them on The Manager’s Measuring Stick from First Break All the Rules.
1. Do I know what is expected of me and how it is measured?
2. Do I have the resources I need to do my work efficiently?
3. Do I have the opportunity to every day do what I do best?
4. In the last week have I received recognition for doing well?
5. Does management seem to care about me as a person?
6. Does management encourage my development?
7. Do my opinions count?
8. Do I have a good friend at work?
9. In the last three months, has management talked to me about my progress?
10. In the last year, have I had opportunities to learn and grow?
If a leader is confident they know the answers to these questions, they understand the employee well enough to be able to carefront, when necessary.
Christian Life Coach 