“A new command I have for you: love one another as I have loved you” (John 13:34)
I have struggled with our society’s use of the word love for a long time. We use the same word love to describe how we feel about our wife and children and to describe how we feel about sunsets or ice cream. Obviously, we don’t mean the same thing when we use love in these examples. The word love in the Bible comes from three different Greek words ranging from total unconditional love, to brotherly love, to erotic love. Our one word for this range of meanings has never felt right to me.
So, what was Jesus telling His disciples (and us) in John 13:34? The Greek word translated love in that verse is agape or unconditional love. Jesus wanted them to love, “as I have loved you”; as He loved the men that walked with Him. Day in and day out He loved them, shared with them and guided them. He loved them unconditionally.
The best way I have found to relate to scripture is to try to put myself into the “shoes” of the characters in any passage. This statement happened at the Last Supper. Jesus had spent three and a half years building into these men. He had dealt with their bickering and their lack of understanding His message all that time. He gave them a new command; love like Me, unconditionally.
Another great definition of love is in 1 John 4:8 and 4:16, “God is love”. 1 John 3:11-18 expands the topic. In 3:18 John writes, “Dear children, let us not love with words or tongue, but with actions and in truth”. John, a man that walked with Jesus from the beginning of His ministry, who watched Jesus touch His world with “actions and in truth”, shares with us today what love is really all about. It is not about feelings; it is about action.
1 Cor 13, the Love chapter, defines love in action words. Love is not a feeling; feelings ebb and flow. Love is what we do to show how deeply we care for one another. We have all read these words before. However, this time read them slowly. Define each action word in your mind and dwell on the meaning. 1 Cor 13:4-8 says, “Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails”.
Love never fails. Never fails. Without the Holy Spirit’s help, I know I can’t live up to that command, Jesus new command to “love one another as I have loved you”. I am truly a work in progress. As soon as I stop allowing the Holy Spirit to have control, when I can almost hear myself say, “Take a rest Holy Spirit, I’ve got this now”, I lose the ability to love at that level. No matter what a brother (or sister) does to me I need to love them unconditionally with no record of wrongs. Wow!
I have recognized there are two ways to have a relationship with one another. You can “see” a person through your natural vision, the way you see them through your “filter” – how they fit into your life and what they can do for you. Or you can “see” a person through the eyes of the Holy Spirit – seeing their needs, recognizing the unique way God made them and seeing them as the gift God has placed in your life.
The 1 Corinthians 13 definition of love helps me to measure if I am living life focused on myself or loving others. Am I patient and kind? Do I envy, do I boast or am I proud? Am I being rude, self-seeking or easily angered? Do I keep a record of wrongs? Do I always protect, always trust, always hope and always perseveres?
If I can allow the Holy Spirit to stay in control, then “love never fails”. I cannot say that when I am in control. Holy Spirit please help us to love one another as Jesus loves us – unconditionally. That kind of love will change our world.
Christian Life Coach 